Is this

Is this the
End of Days
The time to say
Our good byes...

Is this the
End of Romance
Tunes of love
To which we dance...

Is this the
End of Sanity
The engineering knowldge
That we have, in plenty...

Is this the
End of Bonds
Chains of which
Forged in love...

Is this the
End of Time
With moments frozen
And wishes come true

Is this the
End of Game
The hours come
To play never again..

Is this the
End of the Road
Wandering away
Are we nomads again

Is this the
End of the rhyme...
While my hearts cryin
'M jus tryin to be fine...

Is this the
Ennnnd.....

Random Rambling: Part 1

Life is interesting, isn’t it?

Just for fun, let’s be the spider looking at the web of life and take a look at the mesmerizing big picture. Its amazing how we are all part of this huge network of resources, skills, relationships and emotions. Each morning, you, I and every other moving creature gets up to play a part in this huge interconnected ‘grand system’ of seemingly independent ecological, biological, social, emotional, financial and economic systems. Each of us, unique in our own way, spend our lives in trying to become indispensable and the most important ‘link’ in the set-up we lovingly call life. Let's snoop into things for a while.

Consider my Dad, a scrupulous banker. Everyday, he goes into his office, checks financial dealings, passes cheques, grants loans, and safeguards and redistributes public money for the greater good of the public themselves. And for his services, he gets a small percentage of this public money to take home every month. Consider his client, the enterprising hotel manager. Mr. Manager buys veggies, cereals, fruits and drinks from the market; picks, mixes and matches parts of some of these, which in some very specific combinations would manage to excite our taste buds. For feeding the public, he takes as fees from the public themselves, certain fixed amounts which would go to buy toys for his kids and jewellery for his wife. Consider his customer, the profiteering stock broker. This guy channels ‘public’ money from one part of the system to another part and makes an amount of money proportionate to how well he manages to do that. Now, consider all of his investors, the software engineer, the jeweller, the social worker, the policeman as well as the drug dealer. All of these guys work or feed on some part of the general public system, process matter, information or some damn thing from the system and gain from the very same system in one of several forms. In other words, no matter what profession we pursue, no matter how much money we make, no matter who we cheat for a living, we will always remain ‘public servants’, serving the ‘public’ within the system in one of a hundred trillion ways. And our rewards are nothing but the position we get elevated to in the system itself ! Does this seem like random rambling ?

Corollary 1: Our fate is tied to the well-being or misery of our fellow brethren!!

Let’s look beyond the economic implications of the above statement. We are all, yes, all of us, hanging on one side of this powerful divine systemic pulley, one pulley for each of us, the other side being pulled down by the rest of the system. Our perceived well being is nothing but how well we buoy ourselves and go up by making sense of rules of the system and manipulate its working for our own benefit. Some creatures have a headstart, already half way up at birth. For others, it’s a long and hard journey upwards and sometimes, try as they might, they go no way but down. Some use force, break the rules of the game and put everyone in trouble; some move too fast and crash into the wheel; while still some put their feet on both sides and enjoy their stay ! But try as we might, simply and obviously, we, the living organisms on the earth, can never let go of the rope !! Got the point ? ( You have super-human intelligence if you didn’t :-)

In simple words, very few of us are different from the billions of trillions of crawling, flying, swimming and walking organisms inhabiting the earth who do nothing but eat, fuck and die. Ah! What the hell !! “Sorry to interrupt you; I am the author’s sub-conscious mind. Dude, I am going to make a mark in whatever I do. One day, I am going to be a rich, strong, powerful and influential CEO. I’ll have the world at my feet ! And unlike others, I’m not plain ambitious, I’ll work smart and hard and make sure my dreams come true !”

Hey ! I heard you. Yes you can and yes you will one day CEO be. But my point stands vindicated ! You will one day work on outsmarting regulatory mechanisms for consumable market commodities and take company profit to dizzying, unfathomable heights, setting new standards for marketing management and inventory stabilization. Huh? How are you very different from the roadside tea vendor..? He too works smart and buys tea from the cheapest ration shop halfway across town, smuggles it in the backside of the tourist bus, bribes the patrolling cop for a coveted spot outside the rail station, prices his tea depending on the number of competitors around, ensures that the tea brew is at the right temperature and of the right composition irrespective of the rate at which tea flows out from the kettle. And just like the CEO, albeit at a different level, doesn’t he make a hundred times more money than the beggar besides his stall ? Or moving from the lateral to the time scale, neglecting the possibility that you are an incarnation of Jesus Christ, how are you going to be different from the millions of people who lived and died before you ? From times immemorial, people have always tried to understand the laws of nature, we’re doing it too. Ten thousand years ago, people must have fought for pigs, farm lands and wooden spears; today we fight for oil, technology and world domination. You grand dad must have complained about how things were going from bad to worse and reminisced about the good old times. You are going to do it too !! We are all pawns in this unending game, patiently waiting to be promoted to be king, and though one day some of us do make that ‘mark’ we aim to, we still remain on the divine chessboard. No matter what, absolutely no matter what, the system is static, unchangeable, and immutable as ever. Meanwhile, the pulleys stay, laughing at the jokers tugging along on both sides.

Corollary 2: We are all the same in our quest to be different. (Thanks to XXX for bringing this to light)

Thought for today : Where is your place in this system ? What are going to be your moves on the chessboard ? In simple words, if you were to die today, what would you do to leave a ‘mark’ and make the universe remember your DNA ?

P.S.: Go ahead and comment anonymously if you think the CIA is going to hunt you down for your blasphemous response.

(This new blogger on the block loves to have a different take on everything from Sonia’s accent to Sania’s serve. His articles would frequently look at the ‘big picture’ of how ‘things’ work and the relationships between the self and the universe. Coming soon, Random Rambling: Part 2)

leMmme cRy..

i need to cry
leave me alone
lemme cry
lemme cry

donnt wipe my tears
donnt fight my fears
leave me in dark
i need to look bac
y m i here????

searchin for something someone near...
tell me things unknown
i m lost n rotten
frozen ,forbidden ,forgotten
yea leave me in daaaark

i need to cry
lemme cry

dont stab at my bac
load ur guns n blow me apart
see me in pieces
lemme cry

yea i m a bad liar
donnt giv a damn,i dont care
put me behind bars
unforgotten those scars

i need to cry
leave me alone

my end z a world away
stand apart watch me on my day
leavr me alone
i need to cry
lemme cry.......................

whEn loVers part..

It's not what i meant
that this silence should cause
perturbance to your days
was not my idea of how to spell
love to you. i just fell...

That this monologue should need
more than one person's lead,
speaks more about the lines
that once divided yours n mine..

And still, silent we remain
as days melt into untold pain;
Those words gonna drown us someday
please donnt lemme swim astray..

That this stubborn solitude
should look to your eyes rude -
pardon me, dearest, i forgot
i lost the battle, against speech i fought.

a wiNter

One winter far far away
in the blue hills,
wrapped in the timid measure
of an unkempt light
we waited,speechless.

Listening to the rustling leaves,
the whispering rain,
the mourning thunder,
and our quiet heartaches,intent.

Your ocean body carelessly
painted my sand skin
with your unbound froth.

Long since, I have stopped
rummaging the dreary sky for rain
for I still walk sopping wet

Intra-muralistic pleasures

There is a line of separation between having freakish fun and gearing up for the future. If one needs to violate this line and enjoy both these premises at the same time, one has to look no beyond the one place- Hostel. The name itself brings vivid flashes of dingy rooms with rickety beds, giving you claustrophobic sickness; really bad mess food and the works. But believe me, in veracity there is much more to hostel life than these small intricacies.
When I first entered my hostel I was apprehensive to say the least. I had never been away from my home and at that time, to go to an alien city and live among strangers was a preposterous and ludicrous idea for me. But when I retrospect, I find myself deeply gratifies with the way things shaped up for me. When a person enters a hostel, he leaves behind everything to be a part of a completely new and different world. He is like a pliant mound of clay waiting to be moulded to desired conformation on the hearth called ‘hostel’.
Apart from the fact that the food was outrageous and at times it seemed that the mess workers were contractually bound to see to it that the inmates lost their appetites, everything else was wonderful. It seemed like a cultural summit, where everyone was uniquely different in terms of background, castes and creeds, yet the purpose was same- to grow up to be a successful human being. In spite of the huge cultural differences and upbringings, everyone gelled together. A hostel epitomizes the really pretty picture that the makers of constitution had in mind, when they concocted secularism into existence.
In hostels you are away from the perfectly sheltered lives of your homes. You start to feel lonely in the crowd and that’s when you develop instincts of survival. Somehow hostel life seems to be in contention with the Einstein’s theory of relativity. There is no ‘survival of the fittest’ but rather a ‘survival to be the fittest’. Everyone tries to help each other in growing mutually.
Hostels are like dream worlds, where everyone knows each other and are willing to look out for each other at the drop of a hat. You learn to be ascetic in certain sense, but that doesn’t deprive you of new indulgences every now and then.
Where there is a rose, there ought to be thorns, similarly in a hostel you are faced with some saturnine moments, clash of interests, egos, emotional outbursts and cynical perseverance but they only spice up hostel life. And more importantly they instruct us how to tackle problems of life amicably and in the interest of both the parties involved.
Insouciance becomes the code when you inhabitate a hostel. The boundations cease to exist. Everyone is a free soul, devoid of any social stigmas and behavioral etiquettes. For the period of stay you experience what it feels like to be free. The place which resembled hell’s alternative at a time, looks like an abode of happiness. It is the place you learn to laugh with others, cry for others and feel for others. The previous mawkishness becomes genuineness and binds you together.
The most important thing that hostel life gives to us is the persona. Most people develop a personality during the say in hostels. I’ve seen introverts simpletons turn into street-smart manipulators. You are a zilch before entering a hostel and you are everything you ought to be when you leave it. I’ve seen boys become men and men become gentlemen and that’s where it is so important for a person to taste the recipe of life in a hostel.
When I started writing this article, the idea was to pay a tribute to what has been a dweller’s paradise but I ended up in giving you a realization of how impassable is hostel life. When I think about it now, words form in my mind-
Men as always come and go,
But it stands rigidly tall;
It treats us a friend not foe,
Until we can take on the fall.

Purple Haze

The splendid stuff looks green
On the surface, without a sheen.
Rolled into a pure white paper,
Nothing looked more clean and safer.

Passed around with a whimper,
It belonged to us like a finger.
The distance between us was short,
And the pleasure that struck me was tart.

Slowly as the lungs heaved,
None of us ever bereaved.
The smoke sank in deeper,
As we kept floating higher.

My life was colored purple and grey,
As my moods danced to a rhythmic sway.
And then I began crying,
For all the memories that came flying.

But in a jiffy I was delirious,
Don’t know what was hilarious!
My mind was a purple haze,
Sliding past a maze in a daze.

For what must have been many hours,
I had none of my human powers.
Lost in the world of delusion,
My dream was one big illusion.

That was when the days were glorious,
With an attitude that was spurious.
We romped our way through life,
Like a comet tearing the skies.

But now my life is no illusion,
Nor is there any confusion.
The smoke crept through my blood and veins,
to shatter my life to despicable ruins.

The haze has vanished,
and so has my life.
But there is no point ruing,
The day I started doping.

My life

All my life has been
Running around n round in circles
With a pen and a paper
Trying hard to beat the others

My life has always been
Like an open book where
Evry1 comes n scribbles
At their own will

I want to run away
Away from this life
Where all one care about
Is Swiss chocolates and Valentine’s Day

Is there anybody who
Who can show me the way
Way out of this maze
Can any1 show me the way

I want to break free
From these imaginary shackles
I want to spread my wings
Take a deep plunge into my dreams

I want to fly away
Away from these bounded cage
Away from the pressures of this market place
Away from this stupid race

Want to give my life
A fresh new meaning
I want to rewrite the story
The story of my life

I want to live every moment
Not governed by the social obligations
Bu finding happiness in the little things
That will make my life so great

An Encounter with......Me

ROME

The year is 400 BC. In the heart of the city of Rome, stands the Colosseum. Today, it is filled with people from all over. Merchants, astrologers, peasants, every one has come to watch the show. The Roman Emperor is seated with his queen next to him. The atmosphere is electric. All you can hear are the drum beats and the roars of the crowd. In the field below, stands a Gladiator. Dressed in a bronze armor, he stands there in the center of the field waiting for his worst nightmare to step out of the cage in front of him. He knows the crowd would love to see him die a brutal death. He has to win to see the sun the next day, to live to fight another day. His heart is pounding but he has to stand firm, there's a weird rush of energy through his hands but he doesn't know what to do with it. The cage in front of him opens slowly. A huge lion steps out of it. Sweat drips down from his face. He gets ready to fight the beast. Suddenly, another cage right behind him opens and another lion steps out of it, bigger than the first one. A momentary chill passes through his body. He had not expected this.

MANCHESTER

It is 2008 AD. It looks like the whole of England is present in the "Theatre of Dreams", Old Trafford. The whole world is watching. Today is the UEFA Champions' League Final. It is the day all players dream of, all their lives. The match is between Manchester United and Chelsea. Yes, an all England final at Old Trafford. It cannot get any bigger than this. But Manchester United will have an uphill task containing Chelsea. Four of their main players are injured and two are suspended. They could not have imagined a worse condition going into the final match. The moment the players step onto the field, the stadium erupts. The toss takes place and the captains walk back to their respective teams. As ManU's captain, the no.7, walks back to his players, he knows this is going to be the toughest night of his life and probably the most memorable too. He looks around at the audience. Frankly, he has his all on stake today.

ROME

The lions step toward the Gladiator. He is the only one left. All his companions are already dead, their bodies scattered about in the field. He only has a harp to defend himself against the beasts. The lions approach him slowly as if sizing him up. He steps sideways to be able to see them both. And then it happens. One of the lions springs at him. He rolls out of the way but before he has time to get back on his feet, he sees the other lion charging at him. He stands up but the beast jumps at him taking him down instantly. He lands on the ground, head first. The beast is standing over him, ready to tear him apart with its claws. The sudden impact has blurred his vision temporarily and his mind is not thinking. He sees his death in front of him. I rush to the occasion and pull him up. He slashes hard at the lion with his harp and drags it away, long enough to get away from it. The huge beasts seem to be conspiring in getting him down. They ambush him again, only this time it is worse. Both pounce at him at the same time. He is scared to death but I pull him out of the way. The lions clash in midair drawing a huge applause from the audience. They are angrier than ever before after this humiliating episode. I whisper in his ears and he is back on his feet ready to face them again.

MANCHESTER

The referee blows the whistle and the match gets under way. Chelsea take possession and they start attacking from the word go. An outstanding cross and Chelsea's striker has the ball and only the goalkeeper in front of him. He strikes it hard....the goalkeeper has no chance. Its a Goal!! Chelsea have struck in the 3rd minute. The stadium goes silent. ManU's captain shakes his head in disbelief. The play gets underway again. ManU has the possession. They advance towards Chelsea's goal. The Left winger delivers an accurate pass to the no.7 and the captain strikes it towards goal. The ball is travelling fast but is stopped midway by the goalkeeper. He passes it back and its a counter attack!! Chelsea's players are swift. Their passing is impeccable and ManU already seem to be lagging behind. The center midfielder chips in a clever ball and the striker just pushes it past the post. Ten minutes in and two goals down already. ManU are shell shocked. The captain is horrified. He knew it would be tough but this is devastating!! His head drops. I think its time I stepped into the picture. I tell him to fight. His mind refuses to believe that ManU can win from here but I keep at it. Finally, I am able to infuse some confidence in him and he whispers to himself " Let's Do it!"

ROME

One of the lion jumps at him, but he gets his harp in the way at just the right time. The lion is dead, the Gladiator lets out a sigh of relief but he has no time to relax. The other lion pounces at him and hits him in the face. His head guard flies away and he starts to bleed from right below the nose. He is tired and this blow from the lion almost knocks him out. He doesn’t want to fight anymore but I urge him on. The lion smashes him again and this time knocks him down. He sees the light fading away from his eyes. I battle with his mind, his senses. I want him back up but his body refuses to oblige. The lion goes for the kill, goes for his neck. At the last second, I scream in his head and he is back on his feet. He picks up a sword lying nearby and drives it into the lion’s body. It dies. The crowd lets out a huge roar. They have seen something special. The Gladiator stands in the center of the field. He is bleeding profusely, he cannot feel his left arm and he can fall down any minute. But he has won and that makes him feel good. Suddenly, two gates open and men riding on chariots come out to kill him off. He looks up at the sky, calls his God and lets out a cry of agony. I tell him that I’ll be there with him till the last minute but he is not listening. I tell him to go for it, once more. He doesn’t want to but I am not in a mood to give up either. I strengthen his grip on the sword, conquer his mind and he opens his eyes to give it his all, one last time.

MANCHESTER

The game kicks off again and I am incessantly trying to talk to the captain. 15 minutes pass by and neither side scores. Then the captain gets a ball in his favorite spot and kicks it towards the goal. The ball is curling in the air but the goalkeeper is quick too. Well, not that quick either, he is a just a fraction late and the ball hits the net. 20 more minutes pass and the sides are battling it out in the middle. Its almost half time when the ManU’s center forward breaks through and slices the ball past the goalkeeper. The crowd goes berserk. The captain is delighted and I ride on him. Second half gets underway and Chelsea are attacking with full force now. Some of ManU’s players seem to be getting tired, the captain notices it but he knows they do not have good substitutes today. Infact they are too slow one time too many, Chelsea’s striker gets past all of them and sends the ball flying into the back of the net. The captain is loosing heart now and I am having a tough time convincing him. He gets the ball and rushes towards Chelsea’s goal. A defender trips him and he smashes into the side boards. His head has burst wide open and blood flows out without restraint. He is lying there motionless. The medical staff rushes to the site. They ask the manager to substitute him immediately but I am still asking the captain to fight. The manager agrees and I am shouting now but he is not responding. Just as they are about to carry him off, he whispers “I’ll play”.

ROME

The chariots rush towards him but I am standing by his side. He is fearless. He aims at the rider on the first chariot and throws his sword towards him. It strikes him in the chest. “One down, one to go”, I tell him. The Gladiator is now all set to tackle the other one. As it approaches him, he takes the harp out the lion’s body and stands firm. The man shoots an arrow at him and before the Gladiator has time to react it has penetrated his thigh. He cries out in pain, I am having a difficult time holding him up. I tell him to finish him off. With everything he has left in him, he takes the arrow out of his thigh and throws the harp at the man on the chariot. It travels through the man’s heart. He is dead. The Gladiator falls down on the ground, exhausted. The crowd applauds him. I congratulate him; together we have won against all odds.

MANCHESTER

The captain stands up. He is leaning on my shoulders and I tell him to give it his all. He receives medication and walks back onto the field. Few minutes later, ManU get a penalty kick and they convert it into a goal. The score is 3-3. ManU have to win if the captain has to save his job. He knows this is do or die. 5 minutes left on the clock and neither side seems to be dominating. The captain is feeling light in the head. His mind tells him to leave the field. I keep on fighting with his mind. Suddenly, Chelsea commit a foul and ManU get a free kick. The captain has to take it. He steps up. By now, he is totally exhausted. His eyes are red. Blood is dripping down his face but he has listened to me, and that is why he is still standing out there. He looks at the goal. Old Trafford is silent. His whole career flashes before his eyes. "Finally, it has come to this", he thinks to himself. He kicks the ball, it flies over the wall. He looks at the ball fly and realizes he has kicked it a bit too high. He closes his eyes in disbelief. All eyes are fixed on the ball. It seems to be going over the goal. Suddenly it dips, the goalkeeper is late in his movements. It hits the net at the back of the goal and the stadium erupts. The captain kneels down on the ground. He lets out a cry of relief. Chelsea's players look on in disbelief. ManU win the match and the captain smiles. He thanks me for all I did for him today.

By now you must be thinking that who is this good for nothing creature taking credit for the victories of these brave men. Well, …any guesses!!! You know me by many names. But I am who I am. I am the “Human Spirit”. I was there in 400 BC , I am here in the present world and I will be here long after you are gone. I have driven the world for ages and I will keep at it as long as humans inhabit this planet. I am behind the most incredible achievements of mankind. I am the one who doesn’t let him give up. This was how I met the Gladiator and the captain of ManU. Have we met lately? I can’t say because I meet so many people everyday. I can’t remember you all. What about you. Ask yourself!!

The Exodus

Among the clouds, in the skies,
where human beings look like flies,
an evil gleaming eye sees,
a crowd of humans, praying for peace.

Down below, people look up in panic,
as the plane’s antics become frantic.
It spits forth a pair of ‘deaths’,
Destined to win better bets.

It hits the ground with a roar,
burning up people on the floor.
A huge fireball explodes,
and gulps them in its stride.

The remaining life on the land bolt,
running along with nothing to hold.
Burdened with sacks on their back,
their knees tremble, as they walk on track.

The country where they were born
, Moments before, became another’s barn.
Familiar sights pass, of palm groves,
providing rest for nesting crows.

The glorious sight of the setting sun,
the cascading rivers that spell fun,
the majestic scene of standing trees,
for the last time now, people see.

With a brilliant silhouette as background,
People trod, banishing familiar ground.
What else do the people ask?
Other than a future that will last?

It is their for sure their destiny,
that they’ll loose hard earned money,
While their homes, occupied before,
Present a sight of blood and gore.

The time has arrived,
to bid farewell to their home.
The houses where they grew,
with memories fresh and new.

With a fervent prayer on their lips,
and children clinging on their hips,
the women and men leave their home
and thus begins the exodus.